news

I really thought I was done writing about the idiocy of the uniformed media in regard to video games. Though there are new stories every day, I have chosen to ignore them because I don’t want to put these morons’ names in print any more than they deserve. However, this one is too big and much too stupid to ignore.

Janice Turner, who contributes to the Times Online, seems to pride herself on being an expert on family matters and women’s issues, but in reality, the only thing she’s good at is being uninformed and insulting. Why? Because she feels that video games are like drugs for children. “I refuse to buy them portable gaming consoles, Xboxes, GameCubes, PS2s,” she writes. “These are Satan's Sudoku, crack cocaine of the brain.”

Satan’s Sudoku? What the hell does that even mean? And I love her superior tone as she brags about banning these “portable” (and totally last-generation, by the way, do your homework, Mom) gaming systems from her children. But wait, it gets even better:

“Even the crappiest cartoon or lamest soap teaches a child about character, plot, drama, humour, life. Playing videogames, children are mentally imprisoned, wired into their evil creators' brains. And they play them - beepety-beep - on journeys, over family meals, any minute in which they find themselves unamused.”

You’re seriously telling me that crappy cartoons and lame soaps have more characters and plot development than any of the games on the market right now? You honestly think there’s more story in an episode of Days of Our Lives than in Bioshock, Uncharted, or Persona 3? Get a clue, lady, and join the rest of us in the year 2008.

What’s interesting is that she thinks watching television in any form is perfectly acceptable, while video games are clearly the Devil. Why is TV so much better than video games? When you’re watching television, you’re basically just sitting there, watching someone else’s story unravel before you. While playing video games, you’re interacting with an entire world. You’re making the story happen; you are the story. You get to experience the weight of each of your decisions, and the consequences that unravel as a result. Of course, the only way you would know that is if you actually had a clue what you were talking about.

My favorite part is that she really thinks she’s being a better parent than those who permit their children to play video games. “It’s an impossible task to police our children’s multimedia addiction,” she states. News flash: that’s called being a parent. That’s kind of what it’s all about. Except, instead of calling it “policing” as if your children are some kind of criminals (although, maybe that’s the way things are going, as good a parent as you obviously are), most parents, including my own, called it “supervising” or “observing”.

If you want to ban video games from your home and keep your children away from the evil “portable gaming consoles”, that’s totally up to you, I couldn’t care less about what goes on in your household. But when you speak out about it, acting as if you’re superior to the rest of us because of this, while clearly showing how uninformed you are about the subject, that’s when you cross the line.

What’s not clear is why she chose to suddenly strike out at video games for no apparent reason, and why the Times would print such a ridiculous and idiotic article. Perhaps they’re both buying into the recent trend of ignorance in regards to the world of gaming; it does turn heads, after all. I hope completely destroying the credibility of both yourself and your publication was worth it for the few extra page views, Mrs. Turner.

Bottom line: if you feel that your children will turn into drooling animals the second an Xbox is placed into your home, that’s a reflection on your own parenting skills, not video games. Like most children of the 80s and 90s, I grew up with a Nintendo and a PlayStation, and somehow I still found time to go to school, do my homework, have a friend or two, join a few teams and clubs, and generally not turn into a mindless zombie. If you don’t think your children are capable of doing the same, that’s your own problem and no one else’s. Maybe you better take a closer look at your own life before judging the rest of us.

Share this article: