Okay, Lionhead, I get it. I’m behind on my Fable II DLC, I haven’t even downloaded Knothole Island. I know, I said I would do it months ago, but I’ve got reviews to write, and these games aren’t going to play themselves! Now you’re giving me the achievements for the upcoming “See the Future” downloadable content, trying to make me abandon my responsibilities and become re-addicted to Fable II? Okay, okay, you win. I can’t resist being rewarded for getting 25 groin shots.

For the rest of you achievement whores, here are the achievements for See the Future, for a total of 250 achievement points. Not bad for a $7 download.

The Nutcracker  10
Score 25 groin shots, or see another Hero do so.

The Paramour  10
Make love 25 times, or see another Hero do so.

The Concierge  30
Open all the Demon Doors in Albion, or see another Hero do so.

The Visionary  50
Take a look into the future, or see another Hero do so.

The Con Artist  25
Find all 10 of Murgo's statuettes, or see another Hero do so.

The Howler  10
Scare five people while dressed as a balverine, or see another Hero do so.

The Ghastly Jester  10
Make five people laugh while dressed as a hobbe, or see another Hero do so.

The Repugnant  10
Disgust five people while dressed as a hollow man, or see another Hero do so.

The Gladiator  30
Score a total high score of 20,000 points or more in the Colosseum, or see another Hero do so.

The Multiplicator  20
Achieve a multiplier of 10 or more in the Colosseum, or see another Hero do so.

The Combatant  20
Defeat the necromancer in the Colosseum, or see another Hero do so.

The Fowl Player  10
Dress as a chicken and kick five chickens during the Colosseum battles, or see another Hero do so.

The Colourist  15
Collect the dyes hidden in Murgo's magical items, or see another Hero do so.

As always, the people at Lionhead seem to have a good sense of humor when making achievements. I would be all over The Paramour, but boy, it sure makes my skin crawl when people say “make love”. I guess I’ll have to be content with scaring, amusing, and disgusting the residents of Albion.