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Remake This Game: Paperboy
Amazing Paperboy Delivers!
by Sarah
Paperboy is a classic. The number of arcade remakes and console releases of this title has proved that it is one of the most beloved games of its era. Sure, it was a little ridiculous, what with all of the obstacles one would probably never see on a normal small-town street in real life. And what paper route ended daily with an obstacle course? Still, that didn’t stop it from being a whole lot of fun.
This game is begging to be brought back to life, but instead of another port of the older versions, what this industry needs is a brand new Paperboy. Let’s forget the modern-day suburbia that was in no way realistic. Old ladies who freaked out when you broke their windows and dogs that followed you relentlessly down the street? Maybe. Sidewalk break-dancers, tornadoes, and the Grim Reaper? Probably not so much.
The new entry in the Paperboy series, tentatively titled “Paperboy 3000”, takes place in a post-apocalyptic neighborhood similar to the one seen in the original Paperboy games. The main difference is that in this reality, the streets are a little more dangerous. Instead of pets and pesky kids, mutants roam the town, forcing all of the survivors to stay indoors at all times. The only link they have to the outside world is the newspaper, delivered to them by the faithful and hard-working paperboy. Paperboy defies all odds and delivers the news in spite of the mortal danger he faces by getting on that hoverbike and riding down the street.
At its core, the basic concept remains the same: deliver papers to subscribers while avoiding traps and pitfalls for one week. In addition to mutants, a slew of new obstacles and enemies will be encountered in this game. Making your way down the dilapidated sidewalk will be a challenge in itself. Abandoned vehicles, falling debris, and hungry animals will also make your day job a little more daunting. In addition, the obstacle course that appears at the end of each successful day will get more and more challenging and extreme as the week goes on. However, the rewards will be greater as well, with the opportunity to earn extra lives, unlimited papers, or a faster bike with the completion of the course.
A game this big can’t be confined to one system; that just wouldn’t be fair. It would have to be multi-platform, hitting each of the three major consoles, and possible handhelds as well. Each system would offer a little something different to the game to make Paperboy 3000 even more unique. The Wii would incorporate motion-sensitive controls to simulate actually throwing papers; the PS3 could use its SIXAXIS for controlling the player on his bike. The Xbox 360 version would throw in a ton of crazy achievements to make you want to play over and over again.
Like it or not, Paperboy is begging for an upgrade, and the futuristic version I’ve presented could just be it. Admit it, Paperboy 3000 has Game of the Year written all over it. Let’s just hope that year isn’t actually in the next millennium.
This game is begging to be brought back to life, but instead of another port of the older versions, what this industry needs is a brand new Paperboy. Let’s forget the modern-day suburbia that was in no way realistic. Old ladies who freaked out when you broke their windows and dogs that followed you relentlessly down the street? Maybe. Sidewalk break-dancers, tornadoes, and the Grim Reaper? Probably not so much.
The new entry in the Paperboy series, tentatively titled “Paperboy 3000”, takes place in a post-apocalyptic neighborhood similar to the one seen in the original Paperboy games. The main difference is that in this reality, the streets are a little more dangerous. Instead of pets and pesky kids, mutants roam the town, forcing all of the survivors to stay indoors at all times. The only link they have to the outside world is the newspaper, delivered to them by the faithful and hard-working paperboy. Paperboy defies all odds and delivers the news in spite of the mortal danger he faces by getting on that hoverbike and riding down the street.
At its core, the basic concept remains the same: deliver papers to subscribers while avoiding traps and pitfalls for one week. In addition to mutants, a slew of new obstacles and enemies will be encountered in this game. Making your way down the dilapidated sidewalk will be a challenge in itself. Abandoned vehicles, falling debris, and hungry animals will also make your day job a little more daunting. In addition, the obstacle course that appears at the end of each successful day will get more and more challenging and extreme as the week goes on. However, the rewards will be greater as well, with the opportunity to earn extra lives, unlimited papers, or a faster bike with the completion of the course.
A game this big can’t be confined to one system; that just wouldn’t be fair. It would have to be multi-platform, hitting each of the three major consoles, and possible handhelds as well. Each system would offer a little something different to the game to make Paperboy 3000 even more unique. The Wii would incorporate motion-sensitive controls to simulate actually throwing papers; the PS3 could use its SIXAXIS for controlling the player on his bike. The Xbox 360 version would throw in a ton of crazy achievements to make you want to play over and over again.
Like it or not, Paperboy is begging for an upgrade, and the futuristic version I’ve presented could just be it. Admit it, Paperboy 3000 has Game of the Year written all over it. Let’s just hope that year isn’t actually in the next millennium.
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