Love is in the air here at Gamervision.  The office is positively loaded with boxes of chocolates, bouquets of flowers, even those little heart-shaped candies with the messages on them that taste like chalk.  It’s a romantic’s dream.  In the spirit of Hallmark Day…I mean Valentine’s Day, we decided to honor the best couples in gaming history.  These are the relationships that make us all jealous.  While we’re at home, vacantly watching TV with our significant others, pondering how we can metaphorically chew our arm off, change our name and move to Bolivia just so we don’t ever have to see that person again, these guys and gals are out having adventures together, further cementing their love.  Kinda makes you sick, doesn’t it?  Anyway, here are the ten best couples in gaming, in order of bestness.

10 – Wall Street Kid and Prisila

Sadly, this is perhaps the most realistic relationship in all of gaming.  Prisila is, ummmm, let’s say privileged.  (Or you can say a spoiled bitch if you feel like it.)  With a materialistic girlfriend like this, you’ll need to make some serious bank just to keep up with her.  Dogs, cars, vacations – this chick wants everything, and you better get it for her, or not only will your relationship suffer, your whole life will fall apart.  Luckily, your position as the “Wall Street Kid” allows you the kind of financial freedom to keep her happy. Still, way too demanding for my tastes.  Good thing she’s pretty.
 

9 – Darth Revan and Bastilla Shan

A romance that challenged the Jedi order and shook a galaxy.  The relationship between these two force-sensitives starts with a shared dream, escalates into a caring, tender partnership, and culminates in one of gaming’s (and Star Wars’, for that matter) best and most memorable romances.  If you played Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic as a female Revan, you didn’t get the option to fall for Bastilla, but guiding a male protagonist through the game gets you this heartfelt exchange between the lovers:

Bastilla - "I love you too, with all my heart."
Revan - "You aren't afraid to love anymore?"
Bastilla - "After this? No. Nothing could make me feel safer than to be loved by you."

Awww.

8 – Dirk the Daring and Daphne

The first (and maybe still greatest) memorable damsel in distress in gaming is the gorgeous Princess Daphne.  The safety of this regal beauty was the only concern of the hero of Dragon’s Lair, Dirk the Daring.  In the era of vector graphics and monochrome screens, the stunning, animated visuals gave players a connection to these characters that was only matched by their connection to each other.

7 – Solid Snake and Meryl Silvergurgh

Meryl didn’t appear in the Metal Gear series until Metal Gear Solid in 1998, but her bond with protagonist Solid Snake was formed quickly.  While about 60% of MGS consists of rescuing Meryl from various bosses, early screenshots from MGS4: Sons of Liberty seem to indicate that Meryl has not only stayed by Snake’s side, she’s developed into quite the bad-ass in her own right as the head of FOXHOUND.  Ya gotta have similar interests if you want to stay together.  Killing people is an interest.

6 – Pac-Man and Ms. Pac-Man

Without question, these two are the elder states-people of the video game world.  Since 1982, the two have been the unofficial mascots of video games in general.  While they don’t often appear together in the same game, the two are obviously a couple, almost like an old married couple.  Except that they can’t be married, or else Ms. Pac-Man would be Mrs. Pac-Man.  Right?  I don’t even know any more.  Of course, it kinda has to suck to be in a long-term relationship with someone who looks EXACTLY like you, minus the accessories.  They’ve made it work, though, for 26 years now, and there seems to be no end in sight.

5 – Gordon Freeman and Alyx Vance

Okay, technically, they never actually say that they’re a couple, but the level of flirting between these two in Half-Life 2 and its sequel episodes is so high that we can assume they do get together eventually.  Perhaps someday we’ll see Half-Life 2 Episode 28, which will focus on Gordon and Alyx picking out china patterns.  Then again, perhaps not.

4 – Link and Zelda

Ahh, the storybook romance.  Our daring knight bravely facing death at every turn in order to rescue the love of his life. At least I think she’s the love of his life.  There was that little episode with Navi, but he always comes back for th princess.  They’ve never showed any on-screen hanky-panky except for some hand-holding and a quick smooch at the end of Zelda II, but their long tenure as co-stars makes them one of the greatest pairings ever.

3 – Hana Tsu-Vachel and Rain Qin

Probably the most controversial couple in gaming history, the star of Fear Effect 2: Retro Helix and her paramour broke boundaries back in 2001 as gaming’s first lesbian couple.  Both are outrageously hot and extremely deadly, making for a home life that many people would pay a monthly fee to watch.  The Sapphic sirens weren’t just eye candy, though.  A very loving, relatively adult relationship was portrayed between them.  The massage scene was just gravy.  Very sexy gravy.

2 – Cloud Strife and Aerith Gainsborough

Sadly, not all love affairs have a happy ending.  The tragic events of Final Fantasy VII are etched in many gamers’ minds as some of the most tragic and shocking moments in gaming history.  Despite losing Aerith at the hands of Sephiroth, though, Cloud still carries a torch for his lost love, as seen in the Kingdom Hearts series as well as Final Fantasy VII: Advent Chidren.  Sometimes, love can be sad, but beautiful nonetheless.

1 – Mario and Peach

So you just fought through your sixth consecutive castle, avoiding spinning fire sticks, hammer-flinging turtles, lakes of magma and even gigantic dragons.  You are then told “Thank you, but our princess is in another castle” by an uppity midget dressed like a mushroom.  For most people, this would be frustrating enough to make you just go home and watch porn instead.  Not Mario.  Through three decades and countless games, the little plumber that could has never stopped in his quest to save his beloved Princess Peach from the clutches of whoever kidnapped her that week.  Peach must have some kind of fetish for the whole damsel in distress thing, because no one gets abducted as often as her.  But Mario’s always there for her, so I guess they know what they’re doing.